Cat lady

Clawing away at the misogyny of labels put on single women

I am single. I have two cats, Donovan and Stewart. That’s Donovan with me in the photo above. I look like the catty one.

My daughter and I had two other cats, Indigo and Devine, for about 14 years prior to adopting our current two cats.

Does this make me a cat lady? Sure. I like cats. I like all animals. So, what exactly is wrong with the phrase “crazy cat lady” anyway?

This topic was definitely on my list when I decided to start this newsletter. “Cat lady” or “crazy cat lady” is a label often pinned on single women. From what I know, there is no equivalent label for single men. No one says “crazy [insert animal of choice] man.”

I went researching for the history of the term crazy cat lady. It turns out the phrase started with a hatred of cats themselves. Cats were seen as suspicious, and even demonic, so the people who owned them were viewed in the same way.

In 2018, Lucy Jones with the Guardian wrote this article about why the cat lady trope persists, but also how it started in the Middle Ages. Jones writes:

Even before witch-hunts, cats had a bad rep in the western world – with associations with heretical sects and the devil. Medieval types conflated feline sex lives with lustful, sinful, female sexuality: cats were seen as “lecherous animals that actively wheedled the males on to sexual congress”, according to the historian James Serpell. Although, in recent pop culture, cat lady has evolved into shorthand for a lonely, sad, sexless woman. Too sexy, not sexy enough: can’t please ’em.

The earliest cat ladies in the west were, of course, witches. In Malleus Maleficarum, the landmark medieval treatise on witchcraft, a 13th-century folk story is recounted, whereby three witches turned themselves into cats, attacked a man on the street and accused him of assault in court, showing the marks on their bodies. From then on, witches were believed to have cats as familiars, or to change into felines at night.

The suspicion of cats, and therefore women, stuck for years. Jones writes that people were as suspicious of “old maids” — single women without children — as they were of cats, so the two got paired together. Even when women were fighting for the right to vote, opponents created drawings of suffragettes with cats, depicting women, as Jones writes, as “silly, useless, catty and ridiculous in their attempt to enter political life.”

So, the hatred and suspicion of cats is linked to the hatred and suspicion of women. The phrase “crazy cat lady” reeks with misogyny.

Jones said the origins of adding of the word “crazy” in the phrase is harder to figure out. I think it’s just a way to separate the women who follow expectations from those who don’t. I often see a version of comment, mostly from men, who say, “have fun with your cats” when women turn them down or refuse to follow dating and societal rules. If a woman refuses to follow the standards that are placed on her, she must be crazy, right? I do have fun with my cats, so this isn’t a threat to me.

Let me say this: I’m suspicious of people who don’t like animals. I’m not talking about people who don’t have the time for the responsibility of taking care of animals or the people who have phobias of animals. I’m talking about people who aren’t interested in or appreciate animals. To me, that means you’re not interested in or don’t appreciate the natural world around you. The natural world is fascinating.

Plus, pets are oblivious to the bad news around all of us, although they are sadly affected by the devastation we cause. But cats and other pets can help ground us, make us laugh, provide companionship, and even for a short time can help us forget the bad news.

Being a cat lady is now cool. Cat ladies are cool cats. One reason is because of the internet. If you haven’t noticed, people on the internet love cats. There is Grumpy Cat and a fun social media account called Cats of Yore, which was started Molly Hodgdon in Vermont. Hodgdon shares all kinds of fun historical photos of people and their cats.

Dave Krantz in Australia discovered a tiny tabby kitten in a clump of palm in his backyard on Christmas Eve 2022. Photos of the cat, which Krantz kept and named Finn, are the main subject on Krantz’s X and Instagram accounts. His other cat, a gorgeous Tortie named Mia, is often in the photos, too.

The cats of celebrities have become celebrities themselves. From this article titled “How Being A Cat Lady Became Cool” in Elle in February:

It helps that the cat lady co-sign comes from one of the biggest stars on the planet - Taylor Swift. The singer’s three cats - Olivia Benson, Meredith Grey, and Benjamin Button - are very much part of Swifties’ universe, and feature on the singer’s Instagram feed. Mr Button took things up a level at the end of 2023. With Swift named Person of the Year by Time magazine, he appeared wrapped round her neck on the cover, prompting Swift to tweet 'Time Magazine: We’d like to name you Person of the Yea-', 'Me: Can I bring my cat.' It’s a sentiment that her fellow cat ladies can relate to.

I briefly thought about buying a harness to take my cats outside. Maybe I will since it’s cool now. I’m a cat lady and totally cool with it.

Oh, I’ve been practicing my cat photography with some tips from my colleagues at the Halifax Examiner. My iPhone is filled with cat photos. Here are recent portraits of Donovan and Stewart.

Suzanne
Cool Cat Lady